Win or lose its how the game plays you

You never really understand how much of a fucking loser you are until you realize your two years out of high school and all you've managed to do is accrue medical bills and become homeless twice over. I love my girlfriend and she's done so much for me and makes me feel awesome (I know that sounds stupid but I'm exhausted and running off like no sleep bear with me) . My friends as a whole have also done so much for me and I thank them while heartedly. Brandi, Hayden, Jessie, Ruby, Danni the lot of you have helped me out in so many different ways and I can't thank you guys enough.

And just for all you who read this when I say "win or lose its how the game plays you" I'm referring to not letting life dictate what and who you become because in the end most people lose themselves in the day to day.

I leave you with this quote because this is one of the few truths in the world.
"I hate that it takes a lifetime to learn how to live."

Enter the zanpaktou rebellion

Things have been rough no doubt and I get it....I'm just as bad as he is sometimes with the bashing of people and for that fact I'm sorry, I'm trying to lay off and just let whatever negative feelings I have for him roll away because my feelings for you are greater and will always be greater than whatever hatred or anger I hold towards him.
I know things get shaky and we fight sometimes and we get on each others nerves and such but what couple doesn't have these problems especially because we've been living in each others pockets for several months, we were bound to fight and get upset then add on the fact that our respective friends don't get along that ads more pressure and fuel to the fire and then there (was) my jealousy towards him it just seemed like he was getting more of your time and attention then I was and I know this isn't a competition to see who can get more of your attention but I can't help but get frustrated because well my track record speaks for itself most people use me as a "gateway" boyfriend so they can get what they really want or who in these situations, now I'm not saying your like everyone else but what I am saying is I scare easily and I worry about losing you every day because you'll find someone better than me...because in the end I may be one of a kind but that makes me a lot easier to forget.
Now just so I'm being as clear as I hope I'm being
1.I love you and will always love you.
2.I may hate him but he is your best friend and I can respect that.
3.We may fight but even in those times of arguing my love for you never weans.
4.You are the most beautiful women (both inside and out) I have ever had the grace of laying my eyes on.

I love you and I hope this gets to you soon.

Why can't you just accept my love.

So it's come to this why can't you just accept my love it's like after two years you'd think that ya know we'd have some sort of trust but because of John and everyone else manipulating you because at this point thats what it is. I love you but I need some privacy and that's what tumblr and facebook is for me and by invading it you betrayed my trust and let me say something I looked at your facebook and you flipped and told me that it wasn't fucking ok so I backed off and gave you your space and respected your space but apparently my space is free to invade so what the fuck is it you want me to leave? you want me to just dissapear because thats whats going to happen if you dont stop pushing me away. MAKE UP YOUR FUCKING MIND OTHERWISE THE EVENTUAL END OF OUR RELATIONSHIP IS NIGH.