Swallow that lump

I've greeted death twice in the past week and every time I only think about how I hurt her how I betrayed her love and trust and how is give anything to have her back in my arms....but she's found someone new, someone who isn't fragile and who can do better for her, does it hurt of course it does but I can only be happy that I still have her in my life and that things will be better for her.

Aside from the homelessness, small heart attack and almost chocking to death things in my life are still shit. But I'm glad she's doing ok