No longer will I stand by and watch this beauty be taken by the darkness

Why do you hide from me like this two years and your still hiding from me, I can see your hurting,I can see your in pain....I can see it, and it kills me to see this happening and knowing that I cant help you because your afraid for some reason that I'm going to leave but I'm not,I'm not going anywhere but if you keep this up I'll have no where to go because I wont leave you but I won't be close because I'd rather be in the freezing cold of the night then watch as someone beautiful destroys themself.
Things have been better they've been getting a lot better but why then must the darkness come creeping in like a monster into a childs mind. I wonder why must all these things fall apart when they become fixed once again. Tell me what side will win the darkness in your head or the love that fills your life and heart?

So now I feel bad

So after getting my taxes I went and paid some bills and bought myself some movies and of course now I feel like shit for spending money in myself and feel like I'm going to get yelled at... I'm thinking I need to set up a savings account to dump all my extra money into...